Mud Hole Orc Kids and Tickle Me Sméagol doll that says "Ooooh.... my precioussss!" become popular with Elf children.
"The South shall rise again" stickers with the Red Eye appear on swan-ships.
Limited Edition One Ring Cheerios cereal boxes are hoarded by fortune hunters.
Top selling game is Sauronopoly, which features the Red Eye and Rings of Power as "buildings."
Music lovers who grew up on Daeron, Maglor, and Lúthien boycott Backwoods Avari concerts. The Elf News Network, with little else to cover, devotes days to the boycotts.
"Eä's Gate" cult believes that Vingilot will carry them away from the world one day.
Aforementioned cult holds that Lúthien and Beren will personally greet the cult followers.
Speaking of Lúthien, even years after her supposed death, her music is still popular.
Legolas announces his engagement, breaking the hearts of countless Elven and mortal girls. Tween Magazine does a follow-up interview with him.
King Thranduil of Mirkwood reveals conviction for public drunkenness. His underage daughters are soon sighted in the Prancing Pony Inn.
Release of the Thingol tapes, in which the king makes racist anti-Noldor statements to his favorite expert on the Valar, who agrees with him.
Study by the Naugrim Institute clears the Dwarves in the assassination of Thingol and places blame on the Orcs. The Eldar question the findings.
In a coup that is not called that by anyone, the sons of Fëanor toss out the house of Fingolfin. Most of Fingolfin's descendants get fed up and leave Middle-earth, which is unfortunate, as we shall see.
Fëanor gets out of the Halls of Mandos and sues Galadriel for patent violations related to her Phial, which he claims is a cheap rip-off of his idea. His return to Middle-earth begins a long and tragic history of events.
Morgoth convinces the Valar that his actions hurt him as much as the Eldar, so they let him off yet again. He promptly forms his own corporation with Sauron as the COO.
Release of Rings xP by Morgosoft Corporation.
Rings xP found to have security flaws that allow CEO and COO to read minds of owners. Morgoth resigns and hands over Morgosoft to Sauron, who, it is said, remains there to this day, although the company has since changed its name, and Sauron is now much weaker....
Morgoth finally loses his lunch while hanging around Orcs and cuts a deal with the sons of Fëanor to help them eliminate them from Arda. The Orcs are killed off, but nobody seems to remember Morgoth's Balrog allies.
Fëanor, while waiting on the justice system to deal with his suit, reminds his sons that Morgoth is not to be trusted, and that it was a Balrog who did him in. His remarks are startingly timely, because shortly thereafter, Morgoth attacks Nargothrond. Oops.... The brothers rush to cover up their father's remarks.
Sons of Fëanor swear revenge on Morgoth with wild rhetoric and talk of evildoers, but after a few months of attacking Angband, they let Morgoth escape. The seven brothers then declare that they have rendered him powerless because his house is messed up. They say that it is now time to concentrate on the Great Ugly Balrog of the East, who poses the real threat to everyone. Most of the Noldor believe them.
Fëanor and Galadriel settle out of court and form a corporation that produces portable energy crystals for travelers and Palantir brand nodes for an instant wireless network.
Media circus over alleged Balrog attacks in caves. The Sons step up their wild rhetoric again. Later it is found that the attacks were orchestrated by paranoid extremist elves who thought that the cavers were looking for Balrogs to sell information to them.
A jealous group of Elves with a lot of money throw Fëanor and Galadriel out of their own corporation in a hostile takeover. They cannot duplicate the technology for Palantir nodes, so they phase that part of the corporation out, and their energy sources use a less advanced technology. They rename the company Energy Rocks of the Noldor (EnRoN).
Sons of Fëanor order their father to create a Spy Palantir network to aid them in their pursuit of the Great Ugly Balrog, since he is the only person in Middle-earth who knows how. He refuses, and they imprison him in a secret undisclosed location.
Another media circus, this time over the apparent double agent for Morgoth, Maeglin, quickly dubbed the Elven Angbander. The sons of Fëanor milk him for any information he can give them about Morgoth, reviving an interest in him. But the seven brothers quickly inform everyone that Morgoth is probably dead, and the problem is now the Ugly Balrog.
EnRoN goes belly-up, and later it is found that the elves in charge have been keeping the extra jewels for themselves. From Valinor, over the wireless Palantir network, Galadriel has the last laugh. Fëanor is taken out of his secret location to testify, and he lets loose with such a tirade against everything in Middle-earth that he is banished. The Valar "get over" their problem with him, take pity on him, and allow him to go back to the land of the thinkers. In the meantime, his sons have resorted to blatant threats to keep everyone in line. They itch for a confrontation with the Ugly Balrog, and since most of the elves who oppose them have long since left, they are permitted to continue with their program to lead Middle-earth to widespread devastation.
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